Meet Marsha as she tells us about Doing Intimate Relationships Right.
Marsha is a Batterers Education Program (BEP) Coordinator for the State of Iowa. In her work of 20+ years, she has helped thousands of men and women who have been arrested for domestic abuse turn their lives around and learn how to start having healthy relationships.
Marsha has also worked for women?s shelters and mental institutions. In her work with domestic violence, she has created new systems that help all parties involved (including family and friends).
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In ?Doing Intimate Relationships Right,? Marsha tells us about the Moving On program through the BEP. She also tells us about the key elements to successfully having meaningful and non-violent relationships in your life. These elements include: learning how to communicate, having control over yourself, and learning that violence never helps.
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What is BEP? According to IowaCourts.gov :
Batterers Education Program ? When an abuser is found guilty of domestic abuse, the Code of Iowa requires the judge to sentence the abuser to the Batterers Education Program (BEP).? The Department of Corrections is responsible for BEP throughout Iowa.? In most areas of Iowa, BEP lasts 24 weeks.? The abuser is expected to pay for the program and is required to attend every BEP group session.? If the abuser does not follow the rules of the program, the judge may send the abuser to jail.? The Batterers Education Program tries to teach abusers how to have close relationships without using fear, intimidation, or violence.? The success of BEP depends upon the abuser.? Some abusers are ready to change their behaviors and others are not.? Simply attending BEP classes is no guarantee that the abuser will stop violent and abusive behavior.? Many abusers become more violent while attending BEP.? Still other abusers will stop being violent but will increase their threatening and intimidating behavior.? For a person with a history of violent and abusive behavior, long-term change is a process that usually occurs over a period of years.? BEP may start an abuser on the path to non-violence; however, continuing on that path will require a strong commitment from the abuser.? Victims should keep in contact with the BEP facilitator especially when they are still having contact with the abuser; however, the facilitator will not be able to tell you anything specific about the abuser?s discussion or behavior in group.? The facilitator can talk about if and when the abuser is going to group sessions, what topics are being covered during group sessions, if the abuser will be asked to leave the group, or if the abuser completes the group work successfully.
To find out more about domestic abuse and what you can do about it, see Marsha?s website:
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Author: Lisa
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